A Day in the Life: A Day in Haikus

I stare at the back

Of my gossamer eyelids

As sleep eludes me


The ceiling fan spins

Above my prostrate body

As I face the dawn


The taste of last night’s

Bourbon still sticks to my tongue

Colgate, please help me


Coffee and silence

The highlight of a morning

Soon to go to hell


Within my inbox

Is a message from a fool

You are why I drink


I start to reply

And am assailed with a sense

Of life’s cold façade


I hop on a call

To talk corporate folly

With a coworker


When I look at him,

I’m reminded of the day

I lost faith in God


I try to impose

Calm and order to my life

Within a spreadsheet


My stomach grumbles

For the nutrients it needs

Which I won’t provide


Pretzels should suffice

Today, as they will the next

Salt is a food group


Another meeting

Awaits me with the buffoon

Whose wife must be blind


He is the Devil’s

Scourge for the sins of mankind

Through him, we are damned


His contributions

Are as weak and impotent

As his genitals


Some take drugs for fun

I take them to forget him

Why can’t I forget


After work I walk

Fast, to outpace my demons

Never fast enough


On my porch I pour

A glass of sweet alcohol

Just to feel something


Existential Dread

Of a day clumsily lived

Purged by ethanol


The pretzels at noon

Were far more than I deserved

Thus I sleep hungry


I stare at the back

Of my gossamer eyelids

As sleep eludes me

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